What happened to manners?

ABC News reported recently that eight out of every ten Americans believes that lack of respect and courtesy is a serious national problem, and six in ten said the problem is getting worse. Steve Farkas, co-author of this study, said, "We're not talking about table manners, but about treating people in a decent way."
Most experts believe etiquette declined during the cultural revolution of the "Do Your Own Thing" 1960s. Many parents believe if their teens are too mannerly and nice, other people will take advantage of them. Yale professor Stephen Carter writes in his book Civility, "We have come to confuse rudeness with self-expression and acting on our 'rights.'"[1]

       

Lets take a look at the definition  of manners-  1. A habitual gesture or way of speaking or behaving

2. A distinctive behavioral trait.

Why has it become so hard for many of us to display respectful gestures or behavioral traits? I do agree that society has altered the definition of manners. In this generation there is a saying, "you gotta give respect to get respect." Though the meaning is somewhat understandable, does that mean that you should display negative behavioral traits until you feel as if that person gives you respect.

We have to understand that displaying manners is not a sign of weakness. Displaying good manners  allows you to stand out and make a good impression on everyone from potential partners to bosses to total strangers. This can lead to some tangible benefits. [2]Good manners are the grease that keeps the wheels of society turning smoothly. The benefits of good manners are plentiful, including stronger personal, family and work relationships stemming from more positive interactions with others. Good manners will command greater respect from others and improve your social life.

1. St. Calir, Jane. "Teens and Courtesy - Whatever Happened to Manners." Free Parenting Tips for Parents of Teens - Help with Teenagers. N.p., n.d. Web. 31 May 2011. http://www.byparents-forparents.com/manners.html.

 

2. "Benefits Of Good Manners | LIVESTRONG.COM." LIVESTRONG.COM - Lose Weight & Get Fit with Diet, Nutrition & Fitness Tools. 23 Mar. 2010. Tim Horneman. 31 May 2011 http://www.livestrong.com/article/91590-benefits-good-manners/.